Getting the drink you want: Stand your ground at the bar

Half of ordering a drink is standing your ground, not letting yourself be intimidated by the crowd at the bar or by the bartender. For some reason, people who have no trouble requesting salad dressing on the side or mayo with their fries falter when it comes to ordering a drink on the rocks.

It's true that drinks have specific recipes and presentations that good bartenders will respect, but these bartenders will also honor patrons' moods and tastes. You're probably familiar with a Margarita or a Daiquiri on the rocks. The worst of bartenders will look down on you for ordering it, because they would rather pull the Slurpee lever, and the best of bartenders will look down on you for diluting a good cocktail. The truth is, however, there's nothing wrong with ordering a cocktail on the rocks, especially on a relaxing day off or a particularly hot day. Although snotty purists may claim cocktails should always be served straight up on formal occasions, there's really no hard-and-fast rule.

There are, of course, plenty of axioms for preparing a cocktail on the rocks. Oftentimes, bartenders will take the easy way out. Although they'll pour the ingredients over ice, they fail to mix the drink, leaving you to fend for yourself with an undersized stirrer. By the time you revive the Cointreau from the bottom of your tumbler, the ice has melted and you're left with a weak resemblance of what you had craved previously.

Mixed drinks such as Collinses, fizzes, and rickeys require as much care in preparation as the most sensitive cocktails - don't let anyone tell you differently, and don't let anyone sell or serve you premixed concoctions from a bottle or a squirt gun. The true delight of any iced beverage properly prepared is that you get to enjoy it longer - and if you're in a bar where the skills of the host may be suspect, a cocktail on the rocks may be your safest bet, because as time passes, the melting ice will cover most mixing mistakes.

My good friend Todd Smith, the maitre d' at San Francisco's revived Enrico's, once let me in on the secret reason sodas at McDonald's taste better than the sodas in most other places. Todd, who had queried the soda repairman at one of the Marin County franchises, discovered that Mickey D's keeps its sodas chilled all the time, so when they hit the ice in a cup, they won't be diluted.

The same can be said of any great iced drink. If it is cold and well-mixed when it comes in contact with your ice-filled glass, its flavor and integrity will be preserved. The only exception is whiskey on the rocks, which benefits from a little dilution. Even a Martini, mixed by a master and then strained over virgin lumps of ice, will retain many of the classic qualities for which this drink is idolized. Sure, after several minutes, the drink's character will change. But if the bartender has done a proper job, the imbiber will have gotten the needed kick in the first few sips, while still having his or her thirst quenched.

If you're at a respectable establishment, a Tom Collins can be one of the most refreshing treats a bar has to offer. Regrettably, though, you'll be lucky to find a bartender who knows why "Q" stands for tonic water on the soda gun. Never order a Collins made with fruit syrup that comes from a box and travels 200 feet in a stale plastic tube before reaching your drink. Instead, mix your own Tom Collins at home: Put the juice of one lemon and a teaspoon of simple syrup into a mixing tin and stir. Add 1 1/2 ounces of gin and shake the ingredients over ice for 10 to 15 seconds. Once chilled, strain into a tall, narrow glass filled with fresh ice. Top with cold soda and garnish with an orange wedge and a cherry. The slenderness of the glass ensures that there will be plenty of bubbles to help quench your thirst.

As for cocktails like the Margarita, many bartenders only do half the job, creating an overly diluted drink in the process. They pour the ingredients into the serving glass, fill it with ice to attain the correct volume, and then pour everything into a shaker for chilling. Once the beverage is cold, the whole mix is poured back into the serving glass. By this time, nearly all the drink's ice has melted, leaving nothing for the imbiber to toy with while waiting for a refill.

A particularly weak Margarita can often be traced to the use of a sour mix, which chemically approximates the flavor of lime and lemon. Although a nice enough idea, these mixes seldom - if ever - work. Nielsen's frozen lemon concentrate, used mainly in bakeries, is the only fruit substitute I'd recommend for mixing Margaritas. If you use half the recommended sugar to mix this concentrate, you'll have an affordable, high-quality alternative to lemon juice for tall drinks.